I was abused by Gordon Brown

I just wanted to say, that yes, I have also been abused by Mr. Gordon Brown, long before he was prime minister (1980s/1990s).

It sounds as crazy as it does, but this is what I remember and it is not a “false memory”.

Since I have been systematically drugged (with LSD, psychiatric drugs and so forth) from a very young age on (at least since “toddler” age, I think even before that), I was explicitly used for “drug experimentation”, as one of the psychiatrists involved said.

So this lead to certain parts of my brain not functioning as much as they should, so I was often told by my parents that I am “blind”, not blind in the sense that my two eyes are not functioning, but I think you would know what I am trying to express.

Anyway, the point is, one of my parents told me, before I was given to Mr. Brown, something along the lines of: “Don’t worry boy, he (Mr. Brown) is a ‘gentle’ guy, he won’t hurt you as much” and also “and he is also partially blind, just like you”, so as to artificially comfort me.

So Mr. Brown is partially blind, not like me though, but with one of his two eyes.

I remember lying on my back on a bed somewhere in England as a young boy, and Mr. Brown over me, handing me a pill and I remember seeing him (he showed me the profile of his face, trying not to look at me directly at that point) in the corridor of that house where I was in, before I was taken to the room where the abuse took place.

As “crazy” or surreal as this may sound, these are real memories and like I said, this is in the 1980s or early 1990s.

Also, I am afraid another “high up” guy abused me, who was close to Mr. Brown. But I wanted to say what I wrote now, because this is what I can say so far.

I am not sure I can post this “publicly”, maybe I can?

Additionally I wonder, are these kind of people “touchable” at all?

This is not made up stuff, but how to go about this? Should I look for a lawyer?

I don’t expect you to have all the answers, I am just trying to find a way forward I guess.
Before, he had written:

A Dutch survivor who was handed to abusers in the UK by his father writes:

I am male and in my thirties now. I am Dutch but was born in Germany and have lived there most of my life.

I have been sexually abused by the German psychiatrist Dr. Wolfgang Marder (graduate from the Gustav-Liebig University in Gießen, Germany, he used to be a practicing psychiatrist in the hospital in the town of Herdecke, Germany until at least 2008), when I was a little boy in the 1980s.

He was part of a paedophile ring in Germany in the 1980s/90s (not sure if still).

He preferred to use the “missionary” position on his victims, since he thought of himself as a “missionary”.

He also would tell his victims that no one would believe them if they would go to the police or to anyone else, since he labelled them as “mentally ill” afterwards.

He also drugged them and gave them electroshock later on (even when they were still children), including me, trying to cover up his and the pedo rings crimes.

He also used to casually tell his victims how he would proceed with them (sexual abuse first, and then labeling them as “crazy” with lifelong drugging), since he thought there would be impunity for him.

He abused me in the missionary position in my parents bed, with male people standing around me watching and mas***bating.

They gave me drugs, electroshocked me and partially lobotomized me, trying to cover up the perpetrated abuses. He wanted me to forget it all.

It was and still is truly sickening and disgusting, also because his child sex victims partially became his “patients” later on.

After most of the abusers had left my parents bed room after the abuse, the second psychiatrist, Dr. Margareta Müller-Mbaye walked in, smiled at me and also tried to make me forget what had just happened. She said to my mother, the only person who seemed to object to what was happening to me and the other kids, “one hand washes the other”.

I can’t recall at this time if she (Müller-Mbaye) also directly abused me or others sexually, I know though that she was around while this happened, knew about it and tried to cover it up as well. This person and the other abuser (Dr. Marder) even worked on the same psychiatric station for many years (hand in hand so to speak). Also long after these events. So she is complicit in my mind.

This same man basically “treated” his own children sex slaves for a non existent “mental illness”, to cover up his own crimes. Even until some of them were grown men.

Needless to say that I am and most probably his other victims are emotionally and physically scarred for life, and he screwed up people lives in sadistic, sickening and evil ways.

I have partially forgotten what happened (also due to the drugging), haunting memories are starting to come back though.

There is more though, since I was passed around in paedophile rings, not only in Germany, but also in England, I know it sounds crazy, but my father used to travel there sometimes in the 1980s and he basically offered me to them. But this part is still hazy and I have no recollection of who it was that abused me there.

I wouldn’t know where to turn to, I was not able to find a proper victim support group in Germany.

I am still in the process of putting memories back together, after they had been suppressed for so many years.

The memories are still there, some return faster and become clearer, others are still partially hidden.

I have been electroshocked at least once as a child, and put on psychiatric drugs for many years of my life. I found a Doctor who was willing to taper them.

Now, some of the returning memories reveal, upon further inspection, that I have been through some pretty surreal, strange and weird situations, circumstances and experiences.

Some leave me almost speechless.

Many of them seem like they were coming directly out of a snuff film: they hint at paedosadism, sexual, mental, physical and emotional abuses, international pedo-rings, child murder, cannibalism and ritualistic satanism.

One example: I have been walked on a real leash by my parents at times, like a monkey, for example. I have spent at least one weekend in a monkey cage in a real zoo with real monkeys as a kid.

I wish I was only joking, but strange things have happened to me. So strange that indeed almost nobody would believe me, or would want to believe me.

I think it is like you say, only those who are concerned care about these things.

3 thoughts on “I was abused by Gordon Brown

  1. I wish you to know that I understand what you are saying here, for I too have walked that road for many many years and for even more years than that am I retrieving suppressed memories.

    All the best.

    Like

  2. I believe you . I was abused as a child incest it destroyed my life in many ways .I understand how the memories lie suppressed for so many years . Have suffered mental illness severe depression . Only at age 60 did I get real help in counseling specifically for abuse . It helped but nothing compensates for the loss of childhood for the lies the blame the accusations of being mad making things up . I believe you I understand it helps to be believed .life is one long battle I’m amazed I’ve got this far as from childhood I wished for death not understanding why . I lead a good life dedicated to helping others that’s been so rewarding .will things change will children be safer some will but where there’s poverty corruption the children will always be preyed on .its hard to think about it too much but at same time I can’t not face it . Suffer the little children jesus said . It means something different now .

    Liked by 1 person

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